Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Dream Realization

I usually have strange dreams, which I think is a fairly common occurrence with people, but a dream I had this past September really made me think. Sometimes I have moments in my dreams when I realize that I'm in a dream and I watch it like it's a television show. This was one of those moments. So much so, that it felt like I was watching myself on television screen and my television self was looking straight at me and speaking directly to me. I know, this is complicated, but what I realized as I was watching this version of myself, was that it was my childhood personality all grown up. The way I used to be - talkative, somewhat outgoing, more confident, like I could take on the world.  It really got me thinking...how would my life be different if I had continued to talk to my friends in class instead of worrying about getting into trouble for being a Chatty Cathy. I wonder if I would have already accomplished some of the goals I have set for myself because I would be a more uninhibited person.

I used to love being the center of attention. I drank it up. I would perform in front of people without fear. Somewhere along the line, I became incredibly self-conscious and shy. I became more introverted. As a child, I had always been shy around strangers, but I certainly didn't mind being on stage in front of a bunch of them! Maybe my life wouldn't be any different, but the girl I saw on the screen in my dream was an alternate version of myself. Or maybe she's just a hidden version of myself that I'm waiting to uncover. Only time will tell, but in the meantime I'll be working hard to accomplish those goals I've set. Especially since success seems to lie just beyond the horizon.

xoxox
kk

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